20 Funny Fantasy Basketball Team Names for 2014 Preseason

The FIBA World Cup has finished and team USA has won the gold medal. They have done this with ease and all of the players can get back to their NBA related obligations. The NBA basketball season is starting on October 28th with couple of interesting matchups. If you’re a fan of NBA fantasy leagues, whether you play realistic fantasy basketball or the more common type like at Yahoo or ESPN, then it is time to start thinking about the perfect title of your team. This list of 20 funny fantasy basketball team names will help you out.

Kobe-Wan Kenobi – Kobe Bryant, the golden child of the Los Angeles Lakers has proven throughout the years that he is the face of the team for the modern era. One of the most dominant shooting guards that has ever played the game. This little game of words will surely make your basketball fantasy league friends laugh.


White Mambas – Brian Scalabrine made a name for himself in the NBA by providing some of the best towel waving techniques in the history of modern basketball. He spent his days as a humor relief during intense timeouts. Who’s the antidote for the Black Mamba? The White Mamba.

Grand Theft Rondo – Rondo entered the league as a nobody, but quickly managed to establish himself as one of the top first pass then score point guards. The length of his arms is just ridiculous, so it sometimes looks even joke-able how he snatches the ball from the hands of the opposition.

White Man Can Jump – There was a famous Sprite commercial from the early 2000’s featuring Peja Stojakovic. In the commercial he dunks the ball and gives this famous statement. If you’re team is consisted of shooters with low vertical (the Minnesota Timberwolves up till this season), then this is the perfect name combination.

Rose Before Hoes – Rose managed to rebuild the Chicago Bulls, lead them to the playoffs and at the same time be the youngest MVP in NBA league history (beating LeBron in the process); and all of that before he turned 23. After that he spent two years in rehabilitation, but his fans stuck with during the whole process. He’s now back on the court and looking to get back his MVP reign. Good name if you’re a Bulls fan.

Shaqramento Queens – We all remember the duels that Shaq had with Divac, Webber and Pollard in the paint during the 2001 NBA Playoffs, but rarely who remembers the battle out of the court. Phil Jackson and his protage were always giving out some nasty nicknames to Sacramento fans, so this looks like the perfect one if there are other players in the league that just love the Kings. It’s always good to annoy your competition, it will maybe force them to make some compulsive transfers.

Craig Sager’s Suits – We all pray for the fast recovery of Craig Sager in his battle with leukemia, but we also must admit that he had the most unique fashion style that we ever saw on TV. He also has a close live-TV relationship with Gregg Popovich who doesn’t miss an opportunity to make fun of his suits.


Joakim Noah’s Arc – Joakim Noah is the son of famous French tennis player from the early 90’s Yannick Noah, but is he also destined to save all animal species on the planet? Another fun play of words that will make other members in your NBA fantasy league laugh like never before.

Toronto Drakes – It’s supposed that Drake didn’t live too far from the Air Canada Center because he probably started from there and now he’s on every single basketball match that is played in the center. He probably goes to watch junior basketball leagues at Air Canada. There is no such thing like too much publicity? Well, Drake could give some of his NBA tickets to friends and family instead of going to every match.

San Antonio Geriatrics – The San Antonio Spurs are the NBA champs once again. It was a feat that no one believed was possible against the dynamic trio consisted of LeBron-Wade-Bosh. The core of the team is still the same (Parker-Ginobili-Duncan) and their average age is almost 36 years. Is it time for retirement, or couple of more championships will do the deal?

Stan Van Gundy’s Moustache – Stan van Gundy’s career went south so fast after the departure of Dwight Howard from Orlando and after he didn’t succeed to make a quality career as a commentator. Still, he has one thing left that will never go away. His trademark moustache.

Brooklyn Nijets – The Brooklyn nets are owned partly by Jay Z and mostly by Russian billionaire Mikhail Prokhorov. He has brought Kirilenko to the squad signing him for a contract pretty lower that he could get on the open market. Prokhorov tends to create a team of high paid athletes, so it’s questionable how did he paid the rest of the amount to fellow Russian native Kirilenko.

Ibaka Flocka Flame – Mixing things up between the world of hip-hop and basketball is always a win-win situation when you try to make a cool fantasy basketball league team name. Ibaka is also one of the best shot blockers in the game, so a powerful mixture like this sounds good.

New Orleans Unibrows – Anthony Davis is one of the top young talents in the league and is the new leader of the New Orleans Pelicans, but he is most recognized by his unibrow. Making some Pelicans fan (if there are any) nervous or just making a joke on your behalf (we’re sorry to hear that you’re a Pelican fan) is always good before a quality season of fantasy basketball.

JaVale McGee’s IQ – Player that entered the league as one of the best physical specimens with height of 7’1” and incredible body length, quickly became one of the biggest busts in the league. He didn’t improve at all during his time at Washington and had some of the most memorable bloopers recorded on camera.

13 points, 33 seconds – Want to intimidate your opposition? Nothing is scarier than T-Mac’s 13 points in 33 seconds against San Antonio during his tenure in Houston. Tracy McGrady is an idol for millions of NBA because of his crazy athleticism and sense for basketball. He was feared by almost every player in the league before back injuries started to become a big problem for him. Kobe Bryant gave a statement in an interview in which he claims that Tracy McGrady was the best defender against whom he ever played.

We Talking About Practice? – Another idol of millions of NBA fans throughout the world and a player that imposed a new style in basketball with his baggy clothing and sparkly jewelry. He maybe scored thousands of points and hundreds of millions in contracts and endorsements, but he will be remembered as one of those guys that didn’t care about practice. Mostly because of his “We talking about practice?” press conference.


Reignman On Coke – Now we’re taking things little bit before the new millennium. Shawn Kemp was a part of the most dynamic PG/PF duo during the nineties alongside with Gary Payton. These two looked powerful and self-confident until the point when Kemp started to visit clubs more than gyms. He ended his career in Orlando Magic and quickly after that started visiting the drug rehab clinic.

Greg Oden’s Arthritis – Greg Oden hasn’t won a NBA championship even though he joined the Miami Heat last summer. Bad timing Greg. He will be always remembered as the guy drafted in front of Kevin Durant that spent most of his playing days rehabilitating.

Jesus Shuttlesworth – Classic movie and classic character. Jesus Shuttlesworth is the main character of Spike Lee’s He Got Game, played by two-time NBA champion then-rookie Ray Allen.

It is always good to have a funny basketball fantasy team name rather than taking the serious approach. In this way you will have even more fun with your friends while choosing your perfect team.

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